Wakandans are the proverbial Hamites

This must be epiphany season! I just had an epiphany. I think I had one around the same time last year. Today’s epiphany: the Wakandans are the long lost Hamites! Hamites. To make a long story short, in anthropology there used to be a theory, before it was demolished by Cheikh Anta Diop, that all evidence of high culture  in Africa was the product of a mysterious race of people known as Hamites, who though somehow dark skinned, were not Negroes. From Nubia to Zimbabwe, wherever Western scholars found high culture in Africa, it was deemed to be due to the influence of Hamites. It was known as the Hamitic hypothesis.

The Hamitic hypothesis is well-known to students of Africa. It states. that everything of value ever found in Africa was brought there by the. Hamites, allegedly a branch of the Caucasian race.


Of course these scholars could produce no living example of a Hamite, the race supposedly now defunct. But I tell you this, Bwana! I have found your Hamites! The mysterious black Caucasian race that spread high culture throughout Sub-Saharan Africa were the Wakandans. The pyramids of Nubia, the iron forging in Meroe, the library in Timbuktu, the architecture of Zimbabwe. Wherever there was black achievement in Africa it was due to these mysterious hidden Hamites. And now! And now I have found them. The hidden technologically advanced society that spread enlightenment to the rest of Africa. It was the Wakandans! That’s my epiphany. Behold, sir, your hypothesized Hamites! And though they are dark skinned they are of a different race than the Negro. These black Caucasians are not extinct at all. They have just been hidden from the rest of the world through the cloaking devices of their hyper advanced technology.


  1. Afrofem · · Reply

    “But I tell you this, Bwana!”


    Love it. I haven’t heard or read that particular term for years.

    P.S. I just remembered that MLK was shot fifty years ago next Wednesday. It is hard to believe that much time has passed.

  2. This is hilarious and reminds me of Ivan Van Sertima’s story about a white pseudo scholar who stood up and shouted after learning about Cheikh Anta Diop’s melanin dosage test results, “even if they’re black they’re white.”

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